Teaching Empathy Guesses for Ministerial Formation

Compassionate listening and empathy are powerful and transformative to receive, particularly in times of struggle, but is all too uncommon to experience. Fortunately, the skills of attuning to another with warm curiosity can be learned. In my graduate spiritual caregiving seminars, I first teach "Empathy Guesses," a highly structured exercise that builds feelings and needs vocabulary while also engendering in students unexpected feelings of gratitude for being seen and heard by peers, and confidence in their capacity to be of benefit to others. Habits of social communication and internal monologues also arise that do no serve connection when another needs one's presence; they can be recognized and set aside. Students discover that the intention and effort to understand another matters more than getting it "right". This is a teaching tactic that develops spiritual and professional formation for the aspiring chaplain, minister, educator, or religious leader.